Success and Failure Blog

How I miss my Mom’s Bible Study.  We were a group of women who dedicated our time to studying God’s Word and dedicated our time to each other.  We trusted each other with our deepest, darkest feelings with no fear of judgment or persecution.  We knew we would only receive love and prayer.

I have followed my beloved husband to New York in hopes of a better life.  He was to maintain a better job.  The area would be a better place to raise our children.  We would sustain ourselves through use of our land.

Well, he does not have a job. Our neighbors and others surrounding us are evildoers.   I am having a tough time sustaining my land with crops as it is exhausting, time consuming, and frustrating.  There are a lot of nice people in my church but no one I really feel a connection with.  I have tried to start up a women’s group but these women do not seem to feel the need to give up their extra time for one another let alone the Lord.  We have a couple of registered child molesters living on our street. And I have no one to confide in.  Well, I can talk to my husband.   Although he believes in God, we are not at the same crossroads.   He listens but does not hear me.   His troubles are always so much more…

So what has all this taught me.  You know, God uses everything, people and situations for His purpose.  This has truly taught me that the only person, being, anyone can truly count on is their Heavenly Daddy.  He is the only thing I can trust.  He is my best friend.  He is the only one that knows my inmost being, every thought, feeling, whim, desire….This has taught me to totally rely on Him for everything and that is what He wants.

Thank you, Lord, for this tough road and this revelation.   I love you, Lord. Praise God!