Not Ready to Forgive

I Can’t Deny that Forgiveness is Good but…

Years ago whenever I heard teachings on forgiveness, I didn’t listen too closely because I felt I was a very forgiving person. There are many wise sayings about forgiveness, and I could pay them all lip service, but I didn’t need them. And while forgiveness can be considered a “spiritual” matter for some, the Mayo clinic acknowleges the importance of forgiveness. Still, I fooled myself into believing that forgiveness was not a problem for me.

Dismisal Hinders Forgiveness

Before taking steps on “how to forgive” It is important to acknowlege a need to forgive or be forgiven. Part of the problem may have been misunderstanding whatforgivenss means. I was mistaking “write off” for (more…)

Full with a Great Emptiness

I used to live near to two different gas stations. The closer of the two stations generally always had the best prices per gallon. The other station was only a block down and the gas prices were only slighter higher. Naturally, I would often choose the closest location due to location and price value. I did, that is, until the day I noticed something strange and distressing. One day, with my gas tank on E, I pulled in and purchased enough to give me at least a half of a tank full. After I pumped the gas, I hopped back into the truck and prepared to drive away. Only I noticed that the gas gauge was still on E. I looked back at the gas pump. I had definitely pumped the gasoline and I had pumped about 10 gallons worth. So why did my gas tank still read empty? I went in and felt very embarrassed as I explained this to the attendant. The attendant only shrugged his shoulders and printed out a receipt of the sale. “You pumped it, and paid for it”, he stated indignantly.

I didn’t know what to believe. Obviously, I had pumped it and I had paid for it but my truck was simply not acknowledging these facts at all. The gas tank in my truck still registered empty. My husband, who was with me, said not to worry that maybe the gas gauge was stuck or that maybe, after I had driven for few minutes the gas was register in the tank. I had never had this happen before and it made no sense to me. I pumped the gas, so unless they had found away to cheat people at the pump, it should register in my tank! As high as gas prices were at the time, and still are for that matter, it was extremely concerning. I wasn’t sure what to do, but it was easy to see that I would not feel right about everything until that gasoline registered properly in my truck. I wouldn’t be sure how far I could drive in my vehicle if the gas gauge remained unaffected.

I decided to drive to the other gas station and put just a little bit more gasoline in the tank just to see what would happen. I only added about a gallon or two. To my surprise that little bit of fuel was all that was needed. The needle on the gas gauge raised up to over half full. So what had happened? Why had this fuel not only registered but caused the other fuel to finally register as well? There must be a difference in the type of fuel, I thought. Then, as I am always inclined to, I asked God if there was some other, more vital lesson in this for me. God used this situation to teach me a very important lesson.

It doesn’t matter what you spend your time doing or eating or drinking. If you do not get the right fuel, you may be full to overflowing with food, drink, and other substances however your spiritual fuel gauge will remain untouched and unaffected. Just the way my truck would not register the gas until I added a different fuel to the tank, our bodies can not register fullness and happiness and joy until we first fuel up with the type of fuel needed to fill the emptiness within ourselves.
A million pizzas, burgers, hot-fudge ice creams, sodas, books and magazines, beers, cigarettes, drugs, and other things can not and will not raise the needle of our spiritual fuel gauge. How can we be certain how far we can go in life and what great works we can really do in God, if we still go around feeling empty inside. The answer is we simply can not. How can we sate the emptiness and feel full of life, motivation, and a great passion to go about doing God’s will in our lives and for others. We must learn how to fill up correctly, and in such a way that the terrible emptiness disappears and frees us to do God’s will and find fulfillment in our lives.

If no food or drink or other substance will help me to feel full of vigor and purpose for life, what will? What type of fuel do I need? These are the questions that I asked myself. God’s answer amazed me. If we want to feel full of life and vibrancy, and if we desire to shine for God, we need more of God’s fuel! The fuel that God designed for us, and provided for us is His holy, powerful, and precious WORD. Without the WORD of God we can thrive and find the inner fullness we need to survive in this life. It was so simple and yet, I had repeatedly overlooked it.
John 6:35 (Amplified Bible)
35Jesus replied, I am the Bread of Life. He who comes to Me will never be hungry, and he who believes in and cleaves to and trusts in and relies on Me will never thirst any more (at any time).
Matthew 4:4 (Amplified Bible)
4But He replied, It has been written, Man shall not live and be upheld and sustained by bread alone, but by every word that comes forth from the mouth of God.
Luke 1:37 (Amplified Bible)
37For with God nothing is ever impossible and no word from God shall be without power or impossible of fulfillment.
John 7:38 (Amplified Bible)
38He who believes in Me [who cleaves to and trusts in and relies on Me] as the Scripture has said, From his innermost being shall flow [continuously] springs and rivers of living water.

True fulfillment comes from God and the His WORD which is Jesus Christ, the Bread of Life and the Living Water. The things of this world are not enough to satisfy us and sustain us. We must accept Christ as our Savior, read the bible and partake of the Bread of Life freely, and frequently. We must partake in the Living Water of God. Once we discover how to live according to God’s will and by His commandments, things change in our lives. We will become completely satisfied and truly filled. We will never be hungry or thirsty any more or at any time. That is a great promise.
We don’t have to go around full with a great emptiness. There is true fulfillment and immeasurable energy in Christ Jesus. It is a great fullness and meaningful purpose that will register in your smile, sparkle in your eyes, shine forth from your heart and overflow from your innermost being. It is a deep and glowing beauty that others will see in you and wonder of. If you feel empty inside after filling up on worldly things please accept the wonderful fulfillment and immeasurable energy of Jesus Christ today and share the unequalled beauty of it with others.

May your life be blessed and a blessing in Christ Jesus.