Key #4 to Happiness – Forgiving Others

A man was walking with his best friend, someone he had known for a very long time. As they walked, they began to argue about some trivial issue. As they argued, they began to be very angry at one another. The more they argued, the angrier they became. They got so angry at each other that the man lost his temper and shoved his friend away from him. His friend stumbled and fell upon a board, which had a loose, rusty nail sticking up from it. The nail pierced the man’s friend in the back.

The man, immediately sorry for what he had done, picked his friend up and took him home to wash his wound and remove the rusty nail. “I’m so sorry,” he kept saying. “I don’t know what cam over me. Please forgive me!”

“That’s your problem,” his friend said. “You’ve always had a bad temper. I’m going to teach you a lesson. I’m going to leave this rusty nail in my back so that every time you see it you will remember what your bad temper did you me.” Even when the rust nail eventually began to infect the wound in the friend’s back, the friend refused to remove it and continued to remind the man of what he had done and how wrong her was, right up until the day that the infection from the nail finally killed him.

It is so easy to look at this story and say, “How foolish! No one should keep a wound open in their body just so they can hold it over the person who caused it! If that was me, I’d want to get healed as soon as I could!” But hear this, Child of God; every day, in relationships all over the world, people are doing just that to their own spirits, and the rusty nail that pierces them and drains their happiness away is called UNFORGIVENESS.

The Danger of Unforgiveness.

In order to see unforgiveness in it’s proper light, it is first necessary to understand what it means to forgive. In the Greek, the word forgive means: to free fully, relieve, release, dismiss, let die, pardon, divorce, let go, loose, put away, and to set at liberty. The Bible makes it very clear that we as followers of Christ are expected to forgive the wrongs that others may do to us: “And when you stand praying, forgive, if you have ought against any.” (Mark 11:25)

Beyond question, then, the Bible expects us to let go of the hard feelings held against someone who has done us wrong, no matter who, why, how, or what. Walking in forgiveness with others is one the believer’s primary keys to finding their happiness in life. When we do not let go of the wrong that has been done against us, but instead hold on to it, then we are walking in unforgiveness.

“So we walk in a little unforgiveness,” someone might say. “It’s only natural; besides, it’s the only way we can protect ourselves from being used and hurt.” Oh, saints, how little we actually know about the function of our own hearts! And how devious is our enemy, who deceives us into hurting others and ourselves in a hundred little ways! How many saints do you know who pride themselves on how they avoid adultery, fornication, murder and idolatry, only to fall prey to unforgiveness, bitterness and lovelessness? How many relationships, friendships and marriages have crumbled and fallen because of unforgiveness? There are too many to count! Out of the many things that damage relationships and spiritual growth, it’s usually the small, seemingly minor attitudes that silently eat away at the foundations until it is too late. “Take us the foxes, the little foxes, that spoil the vines; for our vines have tender grapes” (Song of Solomon 2:15). The “little foxes” of unforgiveness will always spoil the tender fruit of our relationships!

When unforgiveness enters our hearts, it erodes our ability to love, bond and trust, making us cold, bitter and hard. It kills our ability to develop relationships and fellowship with others – even with the Lord God Himself! “But when ye do not forgive, neither will your Father who is in heaven forgive your trespasses” (Mark 11:26). Many people hold unforgiveness in their hearts in an effort to hurt the one who first hurt them, not realizing that they are the ones who suffer the most! It is near impossible to find happiness in life when you are holding on to forgiveness.

The Importance of Forgiving.

If you ask most saints what are some of the most important spiritual elements in their life, most will tell you about tongues, spiritual gifts, prophecy, and the Word of God. Very few will include love and forgiveness on their list. But what does the Word of God teach us? How does God want the unsaved to respond to spiritual gifts and prophecy? Beloved, all of these wonderful abilities are intended to draw unsaved souls to God that they might receive one thing: FORGIVENESS of their sins through Jesus Christ!

“Be it known unto you therefore, man and brethren, that through [Jesus] is preached unto you forgiveness of sins, and by Him all that believe are justified from all things.” (Acts 13:38-39)

Saints, forgiveness is not just a side issue in the Christian faith; it is the very center of the gospel message. Jesus was made flesh and blood for this very reason – to break down the wall of separation between man and God, that mankind might be saved from the righteous judgment of God and be forgiven of their sinful acts and delivered from their sinful nature so that they might enjoy intimate fellowship with God!

But if we want to continue receiving forgiveness of sins throughout our life (for truly we will need it!), then God requires one thing of us all – that we completely forgive others like He constantly and completely forgives us.

“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” (Eph. 4:31-32, NIV).

The Impact of Unforgiveness.

Despite the clear instructions of scripture, friendships, families, marriages, ministries, and lives are being broken up at a frightening rate. People are turning to divorce, crime drugs, violence and gangs, trying to stop their personal pain and find their life’s happiness. We are seeing Jesus’ prophecy come true: “Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of many will grow cold.” (Matt. 24:12, NIV).

Why is this happening? Counselors and psychiatrists have discovered a common thread – unforgiveness and bitter hearts! Sons and daughters are bitter against absent fathers or negligent mothers; wives are bitter against absent or abusive husbands; fathers are bitter against their own abusive fathers, turning their rage against their own families; women are bitter against men, and children are bitter against their parents. Everyone is holding unforgiveness against those who have hurt them, and the resulting bitterness of heart is eating them up inside. We are seeing a whole generation of bitter, angry, hard-hearted people boiling over with silent rage and unforgiveness!

The worst part about it is Satan is having a field day! Why? Because whenever unforgiveness and bitterness enter our hearts, Satan has a legal right to build a stronghold there!

“If you forgive anyone, I also forgive him. And what I have forgiven – if there was anything to forgive – I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, in order that Satan might not outwit us. For we are not unaware of his schemes (i.e., methods, devices, and plans)”
(2 Corinthians 2:10-11, NIV).

Paul is saying here that if there exists any occasion where forgiveness is needed in the church, he wants to forgive along with everyone else, for he knows how Satan operates. He knew that every unforgiven offense was an opportunity for Satan to bring the bondage of bitterness, anger, criticalness, strife, and hard heartedness to the offended party. These things would open the door for other tormenting spirits as well! You see, it’s not just about relationships, but about your spiritual and natural health as well. When you do not forgive, your prayers go unanswered, your love grows cold, your natural resistance decreases, your joy and happiness are drained away, your spirit becomes darkened, and every sin you commit goes unforgiven by God until you forgive! Now tell me, is it really worth it?

Five Reasons Why A Person Won’t Forgive.

Someone may say, “But it’s so hard to forgive! You don’t know what they did to me! I just can’t seem to let it go, even though I know I have to!” If this is you, Beloved, then you need to examine yourself closely as to why you as a believer would keep this deadly emotional poison flowing through your system. Here are five reasons why most people will not forgive:

1) They don’t value the relationship. Many people simply refuse to forgive an offender because they no longer value the relationship that they have with them. They are more willing to discard the relationship than to make the effort to restore the relationship. This is due to a lack of love, for without the love of God within us, we cannot see the value that God places in every person on earth! Can you imagine what would happen if God treated us the same way?

2) They are afraid to forgive for fear of being put in a position of weakness and vulnerability with another person. This is the most common reason among those who have been hurt before. They use unforgiveness as a shield to keep distance between themselves and those who have hurt them. They feel safer hiding behind the bitterness and anger rather than letting it go and giving the person another chance, as the Bible instructs them to. The sad part is, they are keeping God out as well, and letting Satan in! Saints, remember this: true, godly love always takes risks, and there is no hurt in this world that God cannot heal!

3) They won’t forgive because pride keeps them from truly seeing themselves in God. Many people will exalt themselves in their own eyes until they treat every offense against them as if it were against God Himself! They see the offender as “unworthy” of their forgiveness or love, not realizing that they themselves are no better than the offender in God’s eyes as long as they hold that grudge. They fail to realize that if Jesus could forgive the sins committed against him during his earthly life and still love his offenders, who are we not to? We must learn to let God be the righteous judge of every sin and get out of His way!

4) They can’t forgive because they are focusing on the wrong image in their minds. Many saints hinder their ability to forgive by constantly thinking on the wrong thing: instead of focusing on the Word of God, the example of Jesus, and guarding themselves against the deception of the enemy, they will focus on the offender, the offense, the words spoken, and the pain experienced. They will rehearse it over and over in their minds, keeping the memories fresh and the wounds sore. Beloved, please listen: as long as you keep talking about it, thinking about it, and hearing about it, you’ll keep hurting over it. Part of forgiving is separating yourself and your pain from the memories of the event – you must put the past behind you, embracing the memory while releasing the pain!

5) They won’t forgive because they don’t understand the damage it does to their hearts. Most everyone who willingly holds onto a grudge does not realize the damage they are doing to themselves. Unforgiveness always leads to bitterness, and bitterness always leads to a hardened heart, one that cannot love or trust anyone. It affects our ability as parents, spouses, and friends. Everyone can tell bitter people; they’re the ones who have become abusive, hard, quick-tempered, stubborn, unfriendly, and cold. The offense may be years gone and long forgotten by the other party, but the impact remains long after the fact. Saints, we must understand this: the only person unforgiveness hurts is the unforgiver!

The Power of Love.

The Battle against unforgiveness is being lost by someone, somewhere, every day. Today it’s like a contagious disease, spreading from marriage to marriage and family to family, leaving behind divorces, broken families, bitter hearts, and painful memories. How can we stop it? The answer is so simple yet so deep that we often overlook it – we must learn to LOVE! Not the warm, fuzzy, teary-eyed lip service love that you see on television of get in many fellowships. But that selfless, aga`pe love of Jesus, the self-sacrificing love that led Him to give His life for us while we were still his enemies, the love that could accept rejection, lashes, beatings, spitting, nails, and a criminal’s cross and still say, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34).

Beloved, this is where the real battle for your spiritual life and happiness begins; not over doctrines, denominations, Bible versions, or spiritual gifts, but over who will love and who will hate, who will forgive and who will grow bitter! Oh saints, where are those who can turn the other cheek, who can love their enemies, who can bless those that curse them or spitefully use them? Where are those who can truly, honestly forgive? This is what the world needs to see, hear and experience! This is TRUE spiritual growth and a primary key to finding happiness! This is the nature of the true child of God, one who, like a rose, can take the crushing of this world and still give off the pleasing fragrance of love and forgiveness. This, beloved saints, is the mark of a true believer. Praise God!

How to find happiness – Forgiving Others Exercises:

1)      Make a list of those people who have hurt or wounded you in your life, whether they are alive or have passed away. Include a detailed list of the hurts and wounds inflicted upon you.

2)      Take the time to go before God and ask forgiveness for holding grudges against them; ask Him to remove the offense from your heart. Ask God to wash your heart in the blood of Jesus Christ and to fill you with love for that person. Renounce the Spirit of Unforgiveness, repenting from your heart before the Lord God.

3)      Forgive each offender. Forgive them verbally, out loud. Be specific in what you are forgiving them for. If you have trouble forgiving, review the “Reasons People Will Not Forgive” provided in this lesson. Focus on the impact that unforgiveness could have in your life and ask yourself, “Do I really want this poison in my life? What have I already lost because of unforgiveness? Is it really worth it to damage my own spirit because of this? What blessings am I missing out on because of this?” Now, go back and try again to forgive that person’s hurts against you. Do this for every person on your list and take your time.

(Note: if you still have trouble verbally forgiving this person, this may be a sign that you have developed a demonic stronghold in your life. Ask the Lord God to help you forgive them. You may need to seek deliverance counseling.)

4)      Once you have asked forgiveness from the Lord for harboring unforgiveness, and have verbally forgiven and released each person who has wounded you, now begin to pray a blessing over the life over each person. (Remember, Jesus said to “love those who hate you, bless those who persecute you.”) A sign of true forgiveness from the heart is when we can freely speak a blessing over those who have wounded us and truly mean it from our hearts.

5)      If you still know or have a relationship with someone who has wounded you in the past, it would be wise to go to that person and tell them that you have forgiven them for any trespasses, as well as asking their forgiveness for any sins you may have committed against them. The more hurtful the wound, the necessary this step may become. You may very well free them from the guilt of offending you!

Previous Keys To Happiness Lessons:

How to find Happiness – 15 Lesson Series – Overview

How to find Happiness – Introduction

How to find Happiness – Key #1 – A relationship with God

How to find Happiness – Key #2 – Being Thankful

How to find Happiness  - Key #3 – Learning How to forgive yourself

May you find true happiness, forgive yourself and may God answer your prayers – Amen!

Successful People Know How to Forgive

In Genesis 50 we learn that Joseph was able to forgive his brothers, even after all of the terrible things they had done to him.

Genesis 50:15b-17

“What if Joseph holds a grudge against us and pays us back for all the wrongs we did to him?” So they sent word to Joseph, saying, “Your father left these instructions before he died: ‘This is what you are to say to Joseph: I ask you to forgive your brothers the sins and the wrongs they committed in treating you so badly.’ Now please forgive the sins of the servants of the God of your father.” When their message came to him, Joseph wept.

Genesis 50:20-21 goes on to explain Joseph’s reasons for forgiving:

You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.” And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them.

If you recall, Joseph’s brothers were very jealous of him because he was the favored son of the family and  had thrown him in a well and left him there, then they sold him into slavery for 8 ounces of silver. After this, Joseph was jailed in Egypt,  for something that he didn’t do and spent several years in prison. Even after all that Joseph had gone through because of his brothers, he was still able to forgive them and hold no ill will against them.

(for more background see Genesis 37, 39-41)

What else does the bible say about being able to forgive?

2 Chronicles 7:14
if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

Forgive, we have to realize that we are all sinners, we still have sin and we still do sin. Thus, we always need to not only be aware of it, but also repent from it and seek forgiveness. This is a must, daily act, not just when we think about it, or wait until we are convicted. We must be willing to seek forgiveness daily from God and others!   **

Matthew 6:13-15 And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

We are to forgive others in response to the fact that we have been forgiven. However, the forgiveness we may give to others will never compare to the forgiveness Christ has given us!  **

So, what blocks your seeking forgiveness from Christ and others?

Mark 11:25
And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

Luke 6:37
“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive , and you will be forgiven.

Colossians 3:13
Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

To learn how you feel about forgiveness and forgiving others ask yourself the following questions:     **

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1. How do I exhibit forgiveness in my daily life?
2. What can I do to develop a better attitude of forgiveness?
3. What blocks forgiveness from working and being exhibited in me?
4. How can I make forgiveness function better, stronger and faster even in times of uncertainly and stress?

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** Selected commentary and questions taken from Into Thy Word

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Shining Perspective

“that you put off, concerning your former conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to the deceitful lust and be renewed in the spirit of your mind and that you put on the new man which was created according to God, in true righteousness and holiness.” ~Ephesians 5:22-24

It’s 7am already? How does that happen so fast? I get up every day at 5am. Well, at least I wake up at that time. On some days it takes more prayer to get out of bed than other days. I have quite a routine. I pray and put my armor on. (Put on the whole armor of God that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. ~Ephesians 6:11) I give Jesus the throne of my heart before my feet hit the floor every morning. Somehow there are still days when all of the steps I take, don’t quite seem to be enough to “put off” the old woman and “put on” the new woman.

Last week I had one of those days. You know, the days when every tiny detail seems to be irritating; one frustration after another. My son has been on a trend of not getting up, not following directions and just being five years old with no concept of time. On this day, the morning was full of whining, arguing, complaining about the T-shirt selection, and confrontation about the toys he wanted to bring for the car ride. You name it; he had a problem with it.

The stress has been mounting in my home as we are getting close to the deadline of moving. It is starting to affect us all. We haven’t moved in seven years which means, we didn’t have Isaiah the last time we moved. I find it quite challenging just to try and continue with the everyday routine of getting off to work and school, while everything is a disaster.

My son is not a morning person; at least not for the first half hour of his eyes being opened. I repeat myself a LOT and he gives my patience muscle a good workout. I’ve been more sleep deprived than usual (which is a scary thought, since I don’t get enough sleep anyway) add to that the stress of moving and I lost control.

I finally gave into the frustration of asking this child over and over again to do the same thing. I could hear myself yelling at him. I felt myself giving into the old way I used to deal with him; the way I chose not to deal with him now. By the time I got him into the car, and finally got us buckled in, I realized that God doesn’t yell at me when I make poor choices or when I make mistakes, not even when I disobey.

On the way to school our routine includes prayer for the day. I’m open with Isaiah. I pray whatever needs to be prayed for. On this day my son heard me repent, ask for forgiveness, lay down my stress and be renewed in the few minutes that I prayed. I surrendered it all to the Lord. I praise God for the opportunities as they arise, to show him where my strength comes from. God isn’t angry like I was on that morning, (…let every man be quick to listen but slow to use his tongue, and slow to lose his temper. For man’s temper is never the means of achieving God’s true goodness. James 1:19-20 Phillips)

The Lord gently calls and waits for me to come to the end of myself. (This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. Hebrews 4:15-16) His fountain of forgiveness and grace never runs dry.

By the time I dropped Isaiah off at school, we had both received our attitude adjustments, apologized and our day was set right. I got back into the car and the radio was singing: “…I don’t’ have to carry the weight of who I’ve been cause I’m forgiven…” I could only thank the Lord, I knew those words to be true and on that morning they were being sung just for me; I’ve been forgiven of all my past, present and future sins. (But if we freely admit that we have sinned, we find him utterly reliable and just—he forgives our sins and makes us thoroughly clean from all that is evil. 1 John 1:9 Phillips)

Have you come boldly to the throne of grace?

Importunity is a new word to my vocabulary. I learned that this word means wearisome persistence or of persistent demand. The word itself sounds like two words combined and I will probably remember it this way. It sounds like the word important and word opportunity combined. To me and through God the word importunity means an important opportunity. That is what we have right now in prayer for our nation. We have an important opportunity to pray for our nation and seek God on behalf of our country. We have an important opportunity and responsibility through prayer to see our land healed, to see the sins of our land forgiven and have the mercy, loving-kindness, peace, joy, revival and complete salvation and restoration of God in America.

However, before we can see these blessed results and favorable consequences, we must apply the true meaning of importunity to our prayers and our need for God and His presence in our country. You see before we can be blessed as a nation our prayers must go up to God with wearisome persistence. We must continually pray for God’s healing in our nation. I have heard this verse many times. I have seen it on t-shirts and such. But up until now, with God’s revelation, I have never understood it the way I do now.

2 Chronicles 7:14 If My people, who are called by My name, shall humble themselves, pray, seek, crave, and require of necessity My face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven, forgive their sin, and heal their land.
It is all here. God’s people, the church and body of Jesus Christ must humble themselves and pray with the importunity of prayer in their hearts. We must pray with wearisome persistence and unrelenting urgency. We must seek God with all our hearts in harmony with one another, in perfect unison, and in combined strength of faith. We must crave and need God’s presence in America in the same manner, with wearisome persistence, and with all our hearts and souls, together as one giant cry unto the Father in heaven. We must turn from our wicked ways and stop putting other gods before Him. Then and only then will God hear from heaven and forgive America and heal America.
Our country, the United States of America was founded as one Nation under God indivisible with liberty and justice for all. Our money is printed and stamped “In God We Trust.” Today, America is a nation of many people of from many different nations, beliefs, races, religions and creeds that all call America their home land. We all sin and we all fall short of the glory of God. In our land there are many sins, too numerous to list. Common things and seemingly simple and harmless things have taken precedence in the American way of life. One such example is the use of technology and the use of cellular phones. In reality these are examples of things that we have become dependent on, and in need of here in the USA. It may seem harmless but any time anything takes prevalence over God- it is idolatry. There are many other critical issues of concern and sin. The main issue of importance, dire need and in great demand right now is a great turning away from sin and a true repentance of sin. If one person prays this prayer of repentance and turns away from sin it is great for that person because they when they search for God with all their heart and soul they will find Him and they will be saved. But if a group of a hundred or a thousand or a million pray in repentance and turn away from sin to God, it is beautiful beyond words. We must come together in the importunity of prayer! Please take a few moments to pray this prayer along with me and pass this prayer on to as many as you will.

Dear Heavenly Father,
We acknowledge that our nation has turned away from you. In our greed and independence we have become financially, spiritually, physically and morally bankrupt. In our need to be self-sufficient and powerful and famous as individuals and as a nation, we have failed miserably and come to the end of all our own resources. In our desire to be free and powerful we have become enslaved and weakened in our sins against you. Our nation is falling apart. We have tried to replace you and put other gods of money, material possessions, and ease of life style above you and the precious sacrifice provided for us at the cross. In doing so, we have fallen away from you and the all sufficient grace that comes only from you. Now with humble, weary, and persistent hearts and souls we turn to you for forgiveness of all our sins. Forgive us for putting other gods before you and for turning to other things and other ways of life instead of turning to you. Right now we, as individuals and as the brothers and sisters and family in Christ Jesus, and as believers all join together, united in one accord and with one voice. As one voice we turn away from everything that would stand between us and you. As one people serving as one nation under God, we pray LORD that you will hear our prayer. We need your presence now more than ever. Please come and make your wonderful holy presence known to America in new and profound ways. We pray, seek, crave and require of necessity your face. As we submit ourselves to you, we pray that you will hear our nation, heal our nation, and make us your nation. We pray for a great restoration in America and a huge revival in America and all across the globe. As one nation and one voice we cry out for deliverance and we claim all of the indisputable promises found in the word of God. In these times of darkness, O LORD you are our only light. You LORD are the only hope of our nation. We pledge allegiance to you LORD God. We pray this prayer in the wonderful matchless name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

May your life be blessed and a blessing in Christ Jesus.

Have you ever had someone irk your nerves? Is there someone in your life that completely unravels your resolve with a single word or deed? Maybe it is someone you don’t even know very well or even at all? Out of no where, someone zaps you with unmerited meanness, un-thoughtfulness, disrespect, hatefulness and down right evil behavior! Our first instinct may be to get them back. It seems so natural to just zap them the way they zapped you. It is easy to reason that someone needs to give them a dose of their own, awful medicine, and that they should definitely be taught a lesson. It is even easier to think that you should be the one to put them in their place. After all should you just let someone walk all over you and not take a stand? I think we have all been there before. It is a part of the natural and physical nature (of our flesh) to desire setting others straight when they try to do us harm or deal with us deceitfully. It is in our physical nature to want to repay others with the same terrible treatment they gave us. Often times, we envision that we deserve to be treated better. After all, should we not be treated with same kindness and respect that we freely give others? It just seems like zapping them back will make you feel better. But does it really make us feel better to that? What does God desire of us during moments like that? What is the right thing do when someone hurts us, makes us mad, or upsets us royally? Should we revenge and repay like with like-you know-an eye for eye? Or, should we just ignore it all together when someone does us wrong?

Neither one of these responses are the correct way to deal with a situation like this.   It is definitely God’s will for you help Him teach others (that have done you wrong) a lesson. The only thing is it may not be the same lesson you imagined or desired to teach them. What God desires of us is more original and requires a spiritual response not a physical or fleshly response.   The response that God desires of us is even more difficult and humbling than ignoring insults and harmful deeds.  God is clear in how He requires us to respond.  God does not want us to ignore or to return evil for evil or insult for insult.  God wants us to do something grand.  God wants for us to give blessing in return for evil and insult.

1 Peter (Amplified Bible Version)

⁸Finally, all [of you] should be of one and the same mind (united in spirit), sympathizing [with one another], loving [each other] as brethren [of one household], compassionate and courteous (tenderhearted and humble).

⁹Never return evil for evil or insult for insult (scolding, tongue-lashing, berating), but on the contrary blessing [praying for their welfare, happiness, and protection, and truly pitying and loving them]. For know that to this you have been called, that you may yourselves inherit a blessing [from God--that you may obtain a blessing as heirs, bringing welfare and happiness and protection].

¹⁰For let him who wants to enjoy life and see good days [good--whether apparent or not] keep his tongue free from evil and his lips from guile (treachery, deceit).

¹¹Let him turn away from wickedness and shun it, and let him do right. Let him search for peace (harmony; undisturbedness from fears, agitating passions, and moral conflicts) and seek it eagerly. [Do not merely desire peaceful relations with God, with your fellowmen, and with yourself, but pursue, go after them!]

¹²For the eyes of the Lord are upon the righteous (those who are upright and in right standing with God), and His ears are attentive to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who practice evil [to oppose them, to frustrate, and defeat them].

This describes what God’s will is concerning the matter of treatment of others.  The Golden Rule does not teach us to do unto others as they have done to you.  No, it teaches us to do unto others as we would have them do unto us.  Whenever others do not keep this rule it is up to us to teach them this lesson of blessing and love and kindness, instead of showing them the same treatment they have shown toward us.  As believers in Christ we are called to demonstrate this principal to others.  If we hope to inherit blessing from God, we must be willing to share blessings with others whether we feel they are deserving of blessings or not.

What would it have been like if Jesus had responded to the wrongful treatment He was given with that same hateful and evil doing?  What if Jesus just stopped, called upon God, and said,” Father, I will not do this.  These people are undeserving of such an ultimate sacrifice.  I curse them with the very fate and sentence they have awarded me-death?”  Instead, even after being whipped, beaten, spit upon, and crowned with thorns, He blessed us.  He cried out to the Father, “Father forgive them, they don’t realize what they are doing.” (Paraphrased)

^{Luke 23:34 (Amplified Bible)}

³⁴And Jesus prayed, Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. And they divided His garments and distributed them by casting lots for them.

Jesus suffered for good.  He suffered for our sins and He gave up all He had, even His very life, even though we are sinful and undeserving.  Jesus loved us even though He already knew that many would never accept Him and love Him in return.  That is true unconditional love, and it is the true and right response we should have for others.

So remember, no matter how badly someone treats us, it is up to us to treat them right and know that God is with us.  Our reward for suffering for good and our blessing comes from God and through Jesus.  If we have to suffer for good or suffer in Jesus’ name, we are still and all the more blessed.  Not one of us deserves any blessings and a good life based upon our own actions, on account of all our sins.  We are blessed through Jesus and due to the price He paid.  He freely and lovingly gave His life and His blood was shed at the cross so that we could truly live and have a life full of goodness.   He gave us everlasting life through Him, in exchange for our sin.

I challenge you, as my challenge myself also; please think of God’s love.   This is my prayer for everyone, including myself.    The next time someone steps on you and I to get a promotion, let’s not step on them and knock them back down, let’s encourage them and uplift by promoting Jesus. Let us consider what Jesus did for us when someone cuts us off while driving on the highway and give them free clearance (not a scowl or angry gesture).   When people curse us, steals from us, belittles us, or betrays us, let’s bless them, share with them, uplift them, and be faithful to them in Jesus’ matchless name.   Even if someone beats us up and takes our lives, I hope that we can shine for God and be an example of Jesus even in our last breaths, and that our last words and deeds will be gentle and life giving actions of love and forgiveness.

May your life be blessed and a blessing in Christ Jesus.

The recent apology from Tiger Woods had been debated by many. While he has convessed what he has done, he still has quite a few sponsors who are leery at best and ignoring him at worst.

Can he recover his legacy? And, will (or can) he be forgiven?

the answer to both lies in the public. Forgiveness is something people seem rather willing to give if it is sincere. One thing that is important to remember is this: Forgiveness doesn’t mean saying something was right. In fact, in saying it needs forgiven, it’s flat out saying it was wrong.

There are, of course, different levels of wrongdoing. What Tiger Woods did was to sin – committing adultery – on a mass scale. There were no crimes involved. However, it was still an incredible breech of trust. While very few have committed crimes, a much larger percentage of people have at least looked on other adults with lust in their hearts, committing adultery in their hearts, as our Lord Jesus Christ says. Indeed, all of us need forgiven – if not for that, for some other sin.

We can do nothing to earn that forgiveness ourselves, just as Tiger Woods can do nothing to earn our forgiveness. Forgiveness is something that must be given freely. It is not earned or deserved. It is always a free gift. For by grace ar eye saved through faith, and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God. Not of works, lest any man should boast. One must receive what Christ did for them by simple faith – trust that Jesus Christ, God in flesh, lived a perfect life and died on the cross to take the punishment for your sins, as your substitute, and that He rose from the dead the third day. He did all that was needed to get you to Heaven.

A person can work to regain trust, of course, and that will be important. it’s a hard thing to do – which is why the Apostle Paul warns of the need to finish well in the Christian life. It looks as though Tiger Woods wants to do that. But, the Bible doesn’t tell us to trust others. It says to forgive one another, as God for Christ sake hath forgiven us.

Trust must be earned by showing oneself trustworthy in small things first, so they can be trusted in larger things. A young teen I know is mature enough to watch her siblings. She would like to babysit outside the family, for anyone. But, she is just now working to earn her parents’ trust with those younger siblings. Once she does that, she will have the privilege of watching other peoples’ children. As she gets a larger resume and more references, more people will trust her, if she does a good job.

But, if she were to mess up – let’s say she takes her eye off a younger child and he gets hurt – she will be forgiven right away. that is, her parents will still love her. They might decide she’s not ready yet to be trusted with certain responsibilities, but that doesn’t mean they will love her any less.

This is an important concept when it comes to rebuilding his legacy, and Tiger being forgiven. Whenever he plays again, he is going to have to earn that trust. It’s up to the public to decide to put their trust in him again. In the cynical world we live in, it’s easy to wonder what people we can trust, but we can’t just refuse to trust anyone. it will take time for Tiger Woods to rebuild his legacy, but it seems quite possible for him to do so. The public, though cynical at times, does seem ready to let him build that trust up with them again. It’s just like in the Bible, when the Apostle Paul started out, just after his conversion. It took him a while to be trusted by those in Jerusalem, till Barnabas was willing to take a chance. However, that doesn’t mean the early apostles didn’t forgive the former Saul of Tarsus. It just means that they understood only God could be trusted completely.

However, forgiveness – which is also up to the public – is something that isn’t earned or deserved. In fact, true forgiveness means forgiving Tiger Woods before he ever made his apology; just as Jesus called out ont he cross, “Forgive them, Father, they know not what they do.” He certainly can be forgiven; because all of us have sinned and need forgivness, which was given to us through the wonderful cross, and the shed blood of Jesus, as the remission for our sins.

As a Christian I have learned to say to those who have wronged me “I forgive you”!

It is not always easy but,it is the Lord’s will for us!

The Lord has forgiven us so many times and loves us so much that he gave his only son- a living sacrifice.

When we don’t forgive others we live with guilt and shame!

As Christians we learn  that saying “I forgive you” is a  life changing experience!

So,the next time someone hurts you are you willing to follow Christ and say “I forgive you”?